Monday, July 22, 2013

How Willing Am I? Good Question.

   Approximately a week ago I got my head in the clouds by thinking and planning what I'm going to do after I graduate high school, hopefully May of 2014. However, it was last week I tried to tell you about my heart for missions, but apparently all I had written disappeared probably into the vastness of space. But let's try again in a brief paragraph or two. Last week at church was "Missions Sunday", but hearing the testimonies from some of those who went and watching the slide show they put on has touched my heart the same way it usually does, and that's breaking it, making me wanting to go there right that minute with no delay and setting a blaze of zeal in my heart. Furthermore I decided to dig deeper into some ministries I could work with since someone from Compassion International was there however, some of these ministries were ones yes like Compassion, but they were Mercy Ships and Operation Blessings. I looked more into Mercy Ships for two reasons, one is because my mom had given me the idea since I'm trying to get into Moody Bible Institute and that's what my cousin Amy did, and two because Operation Blessings just did missions trips within the states and not that we don't need missionaries here in the states, it just I rather go to a third world country. However, this is only the beginning to the question, "how willing am I?" well to be honest for about 3 years since my first missions trip it has become a very real desire to serve in missions, so I guess you could say willingness there has never been an issue, but that's not the whole picture here. The story goes as I was thinking about Mercy Ships and I was looking at what to expect all digging deep to see what exactly I was getting myself in to, well as my sleuth in me found it was $700 a month to serve (I know, weird for you to give your money to serve) and I thought "OK I'll leave after Thanksgiving of 2014 if I graduate and go for 6 months since I have limited funds and will already be trying to raise $1400-$1700 to go for that time." After the week progressed I started to question, "how willing am I?" It was earlier this year I was reading in a devotion about how the Savoir waits ahead, and honestly when I was convicted by what appeared to be unwillingness and most of all failure to trust God again.
My breath is taken away at all that has happened in 2013, from change to leaps of faith it has all been a hard thing to take in but worth my life.
But this week I want to challenge you all as I have been. I want you all to listen for God's voice taking the leap of faith (and if you'd like to talk to me on Sunday at church that's fine too I'd be happy to pray with you) I know when I was challenged to take the leap to tell my youth leader I want to learn leadership I felt humbled all because the pastor invited us up to pray for us taking leaps of faith. Believe me it's worth getting rid of every anxious feeling, but as a friend told me that wild 4th of July, "If you are in God's will you won't miss a thing", but even more so when you take that first step the others just keep coming and you begin to feel confident and strong in Christ.

Habakkuk 3:19
The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to tread on the heights.
For the director of music. On my stringed instruments.

Faith receiveth the promise, embraceth it, and comforteth the soul unspeakably with it. Faith is so great an artist in arguing and reasoning with the soul, that it will bring over the hardest heart that it hath to deal with. It will bring to my remembrance at once, both my vileness against God, and his goodness towards me; it will show me, that though I deserve not to breathe in the air, yet that God will have me an heir of glory.
John Bunyan